FAQS

Sexual Surrogate Partner Therapy is a unique, hands-on form of sex therapy. It was created in the 1970s by US based sexologists Masters and Johnson (no relation to me sadly). They believed that people could learn about sexual intimacy only by experiencing it with another person and so they developed specific techniques and guidelines to offer this professionally and safely. Trained surrogate partners work with clients around physical and emotional issues that requires the involvement of a partner. In addition to work around sexual dysfunctions, confidence and inexperience, the surrogacy that I offer as part of the Sexual Empowerment Programme Platinum Level enables clients to: 

Delve deeper into the realms of intimacy, connection and sexuality.

Learn more about sex and intimacy.

Practice ejaculation choice

Build sexual experience and techniques.

Experience something new

Understand their own body, especially in relation to another body.

Build skills, understanding or hone techniques.

Feel physically and emotionally close in a safer and more supported environment.

The concept that you can make a conscious choice about when to ejaculate or whether you want to ejaculate at all. It requires an excellent awareness of and connection with the sensations in your body, often this requires some element of training, or retraining, the same dedication as if you were learning any other new skill such as learning to drive or play a musical instrument. It requires a fine balance of conscious and unconscious activity and in the same way that a flute can play a beautiful tune, a man aware of his body to this extent can make intimacy truly beautiful.

Discover how I support men to have more choice around ejaculation through the Sexual Empowerment Programme.

Erectile dysfunction is often shortened to ED and is a rather clinical name given to a condition where a man struggles to get or maintain an erection. There are a number of well-known causes for this including prostate problems, circulatory problems, medication, low libido, blocks to pleasure, low self-esteem, lack of confidence, anxiety, porn or fantasy dependence, and aging. Medical practitioners often write prescriptions to enable sustainable erections, however these don’t work for everyone and can induce side effects. When we work sensitively with the body and begin to notice what the body (rather than the mind) wants to experience in each moment, some men can experience a full recovery of function. For other men, a degree of acceptance may be required. Either way, erotic pleasure can be gained from exploring soft cock options and re-framing how you view and partake in intimacy as a whole.

Discover how I support men to have more choice around ejaculation through the Sexual Empowerment Programme.

The concept of Embodiment, or to Embody something, is the idea that it’s not just the mind that holds and stores your memories and experiences. Our life experiences are also held or stored in the body. This kind of holding can be of emotions, thoughts, beliefs, trauma, memories and responses to sensations and emotions.

One example of embodiment would be where a negative or limiting belief around body shape or genital attributes such as penis size or shape, can be based on an expectation of how your body ‘should’ be. This belief could show up – or be embodied – in you by not wanting to look at your body, or enjoy it other than perhaps functional masturbation or not wanting to share your body with anyone else. In this example you would be embodying the ‘not good enough’ of your body and might manifest in behaviours such as hiding your body, wearing baggier clothes, experiencing fear/anxiety, fear of intimacy and avoiding sex all together, which in turn can also lead to a lack of pleasure and sometimes sexual dysfunction.

Working with me, we will gently explore what kind experiences you want to embody instead, and we will explore the alternatives that feel right for you. This process will challenge your current embodiment (e.g. fear, avoidance, dysfunction) and can bring about a new embodiment of the qualities and skills you want to live to (e.g. joy, pleasure, better sex)

The process is one of challenging the conditioning and expectations that no longer work for you and beginning to experience your world through a deeper connection with and honouring of you and your body wants and needs.